Our books






Become a Fan

« Preparing for success in a UK job? | Main | Tips for thriving in an isolated job? »

04/13/2023

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

FWIW

If your home institution is a good one and you'd be happy there, then my advice is to try and make peace with your family, as far as possible. Life is short. I say this as someone who has had several big health scares in my immediate and extended family recently. Nearly losing someone puts things into perspective. Surely your family is more important and valuable than any university. Why worry so much about burning bridges with some institution? In my experience at least, as one gets older, jobs and accomplishments matter much less and family matters much more. I'd say don't burn bridges with your family or do something rash that you might regret later in life.

Good luck with your decision!

anon

I was going to hold off on non-philosophical advice, but since what I had to say was the direct opposite of FWIW, I'll go ahead and say it.

The thing is, if your current location is good for you, with the exception of your family, you can make the current location good for you by cutting off your family. Tell them that you're too busy for the chaos and won't be taking their calls / accepting their holiday invitations / etc.

Yes, this can be challenging to pull off, but if they're really this bad for you, it's something to consider.

Ad com member

FWIW's points are worth considering, but per their moniker, are not a direct answer to OP.

To that end: as a frequent admissions committee member, I think we'd treat this application more-or-less the same as any undergrad application, likely assuming (absent further explanation) that reasons for leaving or personal (or, worse, to do with harassment at the Ph.D. level). We wouldn't expect letters from the new institution, or remark on their absence, since we're aware that three months is not long enough to get to know someone (and also, because some explanations for leaving early might make it even more difficult to get good letters).

I also don't think people at your home institution are at all likely to find out (I've never mentioned an application to a colleague at another Ph.D. institution - perhaps I've implicitly generalized the strong and frequently-reinforced prohibition on doing this in faculty hiring contexts). On the off chance they did find out, they're unlikely to be bothered much by it; we all love our grad students, but it's just a fact of mathematics that we faculty loom much larger in your minds than you do in ours. If you leave you may want to explain why to faculty whose good opinion you'd like to keep, but most people will understand, particularly if there are personal reason in addition to professional ones.

good luck!

I’m in a top program where several people have transferred out to other schools over the years. Some made the move for personal reasons and others left for schools that offered them a better fit. In some cases faculty helped with the applications and in some cases they didn’t. Never, as far as I know, has anyone among the faculty or the grads displayed any resentment or ill feelings toward these students. No one has been offended or annoyed. Maybe I’m in an unusually supportive department. Even so, you should go to a school that works for you. And no one should wish you anything but the best in your effort to find that school.

sahpa

Regarding the burned-bridges bit: this sounds like an apt occasion to have a frank conversation (without oversharing) with the people you will work closely with in your 'current' institution. If you have already been assigned an 'advisor', they'd be included; but so would professors with whom you've made a positive connection by December or so, if you will have (people whom, for example, you might vaguely envision as being on your committee in the future, when you're writing the dissertation; or perhaps people you really connected with during your prospective visit). You can tell them that your reasons for going are entirely personal and familial, that you respect the department and them, etc. Your advisor, as I understand it, is tasked with being your liaison to the rest of the faculty, so they should be well-equipped to understand and explain what has happened if you do leave for another department.

I would probably advise doing this before or while applying, rather than waiting until after and once you're already taking a position elsewhere. Waiting seems a bit cagey, to be honest, like you'd only bother to tell them once 'they can't do anything about it'. If they're at all professional and decent human beings, they wouldn't try to sabotage you anyway; and, as others have already said, if they're professional and decent human beings, they would probably try to help if they could. So it might seem cagey because it seems untrusting.

So, in fact, the risk of burning bridges seems higher to me on the don't-tell-them-unless-it-works-out strategy, and not just because they might find out when it doesn't work out and hold that against you. If it *does* work out, you might burn bridges anyway by dropping the news at the last moment and then splitting.

But others might disagree, and I'm not any special authority on this. I tend to think we should operate on the assumption that our colleagues and decent and professional, unless we have compelling evidence to the contrary. (Trust is not earned, but can be overturned -- that's my view.)

Sam

I think the poster should consider mentioning in their cover letter that they aim to leave their current institution for personal reasons. When I saw the title my first reaction was, Wow, a bit cheeky to apply right after starting. When I saw that the explanation was personal, of course that reaction vanished. (I am not claiming that my initial reaction was justified—far from it. I'm just reporting it.) Perhaps search committees will feel similar. Of course none of that applies if the poster is at a tip-top program, in which case it will be pretty obvious that the move is not motivated by a desire to get into an even better program.

Older Grad Student

I am a grad student, so I don't have any information about how similar cases are viewed by faculty members across the world, but I'm also ~10 years older than the average grad student, so I can share what I would do given my experience in similar situations outside the academia.
If your reasons to look for a different grad school are family related, then in my judgment, there is simply no reason at all not to share your situation with faculty members and ask their advice. People are in general willing to help, and maybe you'll be surprised to learn from their advice about options you will have not considered.
If people feel that they are participants in the process of deciding and that they understand why the choice is hard, they will likely not be offended no matter what you choose in the end. Also, for you, I think that living the whole first year of your Ph.D. "undercover" is a recipe for not getting the most out of it, not to mention increasing your prospects for experiencing stress and anxiety.

Verify your Comment

Previewing your Comment

This is only a preview. Your comment has not yet been posted.

Working...
Your comment could not be posted. Error type:
Your comment has been saved. Comments are moderated and will not appear until approved by the author. Post another comment

The letters and numbers you entered did not match the image. Please try again.

As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.

Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.

Working...

Post a comment

Comments are moderated, and will not appear until the author has approved them.

Your Information

(Name and email address are required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)

Job-market reporting thread

Current Job-Market Discussion Thread

Philosophers in Industry Directory

Categories

Subscribe to the Cocoon