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thanks for this, Marcus.

Another thing is that if you're ABD and/or still hanging around your grad program, people will be very aware that you're on the market and will constantly ask you about the job market in ways that are well-intended but may not be ultimately helpful (e.g., "you're on the market? oh man, that sucks!") or, ("how's the market going" honest answer: "phenomenally bad, thanks for asking")

I think just being prepared for this and having a standard answer can help. I took to just steering the conversation in a different direction. Another phenomenon is that other grad students want to know which interviews you've had and where. I think to some extent they want to try to figure out how they'll do when time comes -- or if they're on the market, to make comparisons. This is nosy, and it's well within your rights to cut short these questions with a simple, "Yeah, i've decided on a policy of not talking about my interviews, for my own sanity."

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