In the spirit of philosophy light-bulb jokes, each semester I tell my students a few light-bulb jokes and ask them to come up with a few of their own. Here are a few examples:
(1) How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
Three; one to change the light-bulb and two to debate whether they ought to, and if so, whether it follows that they can.
(2) How many ancient philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
Four; one to change the light-bulb and three to say "Yes, Socrates," "Well done, Socrates," "Good job, Socrates."
(3) How many medieval philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
Two; one to change the light-bulb and one to check what Aristotle said about changing light-bulbs.
Feel free to add your own jokes in the comments.
I wish everyone a very successful semester.
Q: How many Pyrrhonian skeptics does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: ...
Posted by: Mark Alfano | 08/30/2012 at 08:17 PM
I feel like there are probably some good jokes about the number of solipsists required to change a light bulb, but I don't think anyone else would find them funny.
Posted by: David Morrow | 08/30/2012 at 10:58 PM
(4) How many Rawlsians does it take to change a light-bulb?
Answer: none. Rawls never said to change light-bulbs.
(5) How many Marxists does it take to change a lightbulb?
Answer: none. They rip out light-sockets to overthrow the oppressive forces of electricity. Alas, they end up shrouded in darkness.
(6) How many mind-body dualists does it take to change a light-bulb?
Answer: 1/2. Their minds are elsewhere.
Posted by: Marcus Arvan | 08/31/2012 at 12:04 PM
(7) How many environmental ethicists does it take to change a light-bulb?
Answer: none. Any supply of working light bulbs should be stored for future generations to use.
Posted by: Kyle Whyte | 08/31/2012 at 03:03 PM
Ramsey asked Wittgenstein... He said, Don't foot the ladder!
Posted by: Douglas Section | 08/31/2012 at 07:46 PM
Q: How many Eleatic Philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
A: Change?!
Posted by: Matthew Duncombe | 09/02/2012 at 04:05 PM
How many Wittgensteinians does it take to change a light bulb?
Depends if it's early or late.
Posted by: Brad | 09/06/2012 at 05:49 PM
Not exactly philosophy, but related. I came up with this one some years ago.
How many absurdist playwrights does it take to change a light bulb?
Green.
Posted by: Brad | 09/06/2012 at 05:50 PM
Yeah just keep your light bulbs for future use he got a point.
Posted by: hazardous location lighting | 10/07/2012 at 02:11 PM
Q: When was the light bulb invented?
A: In the Enlightenment.
Poor I know but it's quite a difficult ask. I was thinking about the Allegory of the Cave and switching on the light but couldn't get it into a good punchline.
Posted by: Alpha Lights | 12/03/2012 at 10:20 AM
Q: How many Heideggerians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: One. But after the act he is overwhelmed by an agrarian nostalgia and regrets his enframing of electricity.
Posted by: Joe Battle | 02/12/2014 at 08:30 AM
How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
A: It doesn't matter: they don't know what that means!
Posted by: andy | 09/30/2014 at 04:38 PM
How many philosophers does it take to change a light-bulb?
Infinitely many. The first starts to discuss what it means for a light-bulb to exist, the second is wondering about the nature of light, the third argues that light is something taking place in your head, etc. etc.
Posted by: Pieter Moree | 07/05/2015 at 02:17 AM
How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb?
It's a purely hypothetical situation so nobody really knows
Posted by: James Reed | 12/06/2016 at 09:41 AM
How many philosophers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Depends on how many don't get hung up on dissecting this question ad infinitum and just enjoy the experience instead.
Posted by: MMOJ | 05/18/2017 at 08:46 AM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ur5fGSBsfq8
Posted by: Charlie | 11/06/2017 at 10:34 AM